April's Fool

So, yeh...

It is about that time again. My favorite holiday; APRIL FOOLS!!!!!! Love it. I plan my master prank months in advance so that it is simple, yet effective, and gets the response that I want. This year.... I am engaged!!! It was funny two days ago once I sprung it into action, but not so funny right here and now.

Why?.......Its not funny b/c it is almost as if I am saying to my friends "hahahah you fell for it, you actually thought that someone found me worthy enough to be married too! lmao You suckers!" Not quite the laugh I was planning on but it is slowly coming to look that way.Sad....what was going on in my mind to think to use this as a prank?

Also, the friend/guy (friend used descriptively not literally...I suppose) is this guy that I met for the first time in December..... last time I have ever seen him. Military cat, extremely handsome and keeps me laughing... when he is present. So, when we first started talking on the phone... every day; he calling me more so than I calling him. It was cute. Then he went away on a work related trip and the calls came to a halt. They picked up a little bit, after a while, but not by much. I was okay with that... no need to converse daily. And then he decided to surprise me at this event I was volunteering for. He took pics of places around me to show me that he was there. Rather clever. Romantic, even. SO we kicked it while we ate and watched football, then he came and watched the show, and the night ended well, I think. Or thought. But the calls died again. A cycle here...see it? I do.

So I get everything from he's dropped his phone in the toilet on 2 separate occasions, he left his phone at home, he left his charger at home, or he was out of town ( I am guessing that there were no cell towers where he was or phones were prohibited by law). This screams so loudly... BITCH, HE IS NOT ONLY JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU, BUT SOOOO OBVIOUSLY BEYOND A SHADOW OF A DOUBT JUST NOT FUCKING INTO YOU!!! I get it, I hear the masses yelling at me and calling me stupid. He doesn't call me any more. I send a text every blue moon... yeh, just horrible. And after the stunt he pulled of V-day... I put him in that abstract friend zone for life. So why is he still in the pic?

Because... I needed someone to help me pull this prank off. He agreed. A small part of me still liking him but not making any attempts to make it solid. I just cant depend on this guy and it sucks like a prostitute on U Street in DC at 4am. I swear to you it does... and I feel used every time I even speak to him. If the conversation ends in.. I'll call you back, I can pretty much bank that it aint gonna happen. He still says stuff like "I'm trying to make you mine" or I am working on finding time for us to kick it." I smell bullshit. Did he NOT know that I am the Arch nemesis to Bullshit?! SO yeh.... at the end of this prank. I'm cutting my losses and leaving him alone.

Fine doesnt get him a "do whatever the hell you want for free" pass, although I did consider it. Kat Williams once joked that "Self esteem is called S-E-L-F esteem, how can anyone else jack up how you think about yourself?" Good question. So... I am exercising my self esteem so that I dont feel so sucky for fawning over a guy who isnt fawning over me. I am worth the fawning dammit! So what about me isnt making men fawn? That begins my journey. Stay tuned.....

Sincerely Arch Nemesis.